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Thread: Weird news report of the day...

  1. #1
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    Weird news report of the day...

    who is writing these articles, someone who formerly worked for "the onion"???

    Unaware Police Carry Guns, Mountain Lion Charges at Officer
    KNBC-TV
    updated 10 minutes ago

    ARCADIA, Calif. -- Arcadia police fatally shot a 140-pound mountain lion that killed a dog Wednesday in an Arcadia backyard, then charged at an officer, police said. The encounter near the Angeles National Forest in the 2200 block of Canyon Road occurred shortly after someone reported the big cat in their back yard about 7:50 p.m., Arcadia police Lt. Larry Goodman said. An Australian shepherd that belonged to the residents was barking at the cougar, then suddenly fell quiet, he said. When the officers entered the backyard, they saw the mountain lion standing over the dog. The cat then charged at the officers, prompting them to open fire, he said. The carcasses of both animals were turned over to the Pasadena Humane Society, pending retrieval by the Department of Fish and Game, which will investigate the shooting.
    .
    "The dogs bark, but the caravan moves on"

  2. #2
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    Yeah,the headline writer must be off his Med's.
    An instant classic.

  3. #3
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    I didn't even notice the title at first.
    i need a job. hire me.

  4. #4
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    When will they post a headline, "Unaware his victim was carrying a gun, a rapist attacked a woman."

  5. #5
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    i need a job. hire me.
    KNBC-TV is looking for a new headline writer,Sean!

  6. #6
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    Could have been:

    Disoriented Mountain Lion felled in barrage of police gunfire ....
    The ONLY thing certain in life is DEATH. Live each day to its' FULLEST!

  7. #7
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    Why did the big mean cops have to shoot the poor kitty?

    Couldn't they have - like, used pepper spray or something ???

    Governments don't live together. People live together.

  8. #8
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    Arcadia police fatally shot a 140-pound mountain lion that killed a dog Wednesday in an Arcadia backyard, then charged at an officer, police said.


    I would be seriously freaked out...

    According to the article, Arcadia police fatally shoot the mountain lion. And then the mountain lion charges at an officer. Freaky.

    Or if we read the article again literally, the Arcadia police fatally shoot the mountain lion, and then the police charge at another officer. Equally freaky.
    "Lie to a liar, for lies are his coin; steal from a thief, for that is easy; lay a trap for the trickster and catch him at first attempt, but beware of an honest man. "

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    Fun never brought one down in a hail of gun fire for me it was one shot from my .44
    Some day my children will have a lot of guns and that will bring a smile to my face.

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    "Jack Booted Thug Kills Innocent Kitty"
    Charter member PWU (Pud Whackers Unanimous!)

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    Gun Wielding Maniac Slays Feline Attempting to Eat Dinner!

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    According to the article, Arcadia police fatally shoot the mountain lion. And then the mountain lion charges at an officer. Freaky.
    Whoa..... Who would have thought about battling hordes of zombie mountain lions?

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    Mean cops should only have water pistol to discipline bad kitteh!
    No, holding that venegence upon their enemies was more to be desired than any personal blessings, and reckoning this to be the most glorious of hazards, they joyfully determined to accept the risk... Thus, choosing to die resisting, rather than to live submitting, they fled only from dishonor... Pericles' Funeral Oration

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    It was really Terminator II.
    No matter where you are in the world, no matter your race or religion, there is only one antidote to an armed bad guy and that is an armed good guy.

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    "Idiots approach feeding lion -- stop provoked attack with lucky shot."

    I'm not saying they shouldn't have killed it, just not risked their lives to do so.

    ~mmqb~

  16. #16
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    Sounds to me like the writer is using sarcasm and humor. I could see myself using that one.
    The worst things happen at the most critical times, and it's these moments that YOU need to be flawless, not the gun.

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    What caliber for zombie kitties?

    Dope
    Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars. -griz

  18. #18
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    I'll wager the writer does read The Onion.

  19. #19
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    I at first read it this way:
    "Police who are unaware [of something] carry guns. In other news, a mountain lion charged at an officer."

    Now that i get wha tthe headline is saying, I think it's rather humorous
    On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], "Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?" I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.

  20. #20
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    How about this one ...

    Teen accused of hitting mom, baby goes to court
    I hope the baby isn't representing him/herself

    http://www.billingsgazette.net/artic...l/39-court.txt
    Governments don't live together. People live together.

  21. #21
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    Gun

    Oh, well. Here goes:

    FROM:

    http://imprezzions.blogspot.com/2005...headlines.html

    - Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
    - War Dims Hope for Peace
    - If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While

    The Subject Confusions:
    - Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni
    - Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
    - Eye Drops off Shelves

    The Double Meanings:
    - Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
    - Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead
    - Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

    And basically we have those that just sound so wrong
    - Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing
    - British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
    - Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
    When I was scouting around for a Zee car, I found this ad. Decided not to buy it:
    Last edited by 230RN; January 11th, 2010 at 10:39 PM.

  22. #22
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    Pssh, if my local paper regularly had headlines like that, I'd probably subscribe even if it were anti-2A.

    [ducks]
    IANAL. TINLA. BYOB.
    You can't spell "B.O.H.I.C.A." without B.H.O.

  23. #23
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    I'll wager the writer does read The Onion.



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